Google throws a nice red warning saying the SSL certificate is invalid and they want us to host on their platform?

You can't get rid of the twitter popup on Android and it takes up half the reading space.

What OS and browser do you use?

Have you looked at all these sites that load really slow (well above 5000ms), and that get instantly wiped out if they so much as make HN frontpage?

Did you know that most of those are hosted on one or another garden variety of cloud hosting? (we shall not mention the guilty, they know who they are)

Did you know that you'll loose about 90% of your visitors if your page doesn't load within 400ms?

No, go ahead, get your cloudwhatever hosting. It's the end-all be-all solution for everything.