(equivalently, if you use screen; the key point is the \eP and the \e\\ between which the real xterm escape codes go, or else screen will eat your escape codes which will never see the light of day)

    augroup term_normal
     au!      
     autocmd WinNew * let w:winnew = 1
     autocmd CmdlineEnter * let w:outcmd = 0
     autocmd CmdlineLeave * let w:outcmd = 1
     autocmd WinEnter * if exists ('w:winnew') | unlet w:winnew | if (mode() == 't') | call Termcursor () | endif | elseif get(w:, 'outcmd', 1) && (mode() == 't') | call feedkeys("\<C-@>N", "") | endif
     autocmd WinLeave * if (mode() == 't') && (! exists('w:tu')) | call feedkeys("\<C-@>N", 'x') | call Normalcursor () | elseif (mode(1) == 'nt') && (exists('w:tu')) | call feedkeys("i", 'ix') | endif
    
     tmap <expr> <C-@><C-@> ((mode() == 't') && get(w:, 'outcmd', 1)) ? '<C-@>N' : '<C-@><C-@>'
     augroup end
    
    let &t_SI = "\eP\e[6 q\e]12;#FF00DF\<C-g>\e\\"
    let &t_EI = "\eP\e[2 q\e]12;#FF00DF\<C-g>\e\\"
    let &t_ti = "\eP\e[4 q\e]12;#FF00DF\<C-g>\e\\"
    let &t_te = "\eP\e[2 q\e]12;#FF00DF\<C-g>\e\\"
    let &t_Us = "\eP\e[4:2m\e\\"
    let &t_ds = "\eP\e[4:4m\e\\"
    let &t_Ds = "\eP\e[58:5:3m\e[4:5m\e\\"
    
    function! Normalcursor ()
     let &t_ve ="\eP\e[2 q\e]12;#FF00DF\<C-g>\e\\" 
     let &t_vi ="\eP\e[2 q\e]12;#FF00DF\<C-g>\e\\"
     endfunction
    function! Echonormalcursor ()
     call echoraw("\eP\e[2 q\e]12;#FF00DF\<C-g>\e\\")
     endfunction
    function! Termcursor ()
     let &t_ve ="\eP\e[4 q\e]12;#FF00DF\<C-g>\e\\"
     let &t_vi ="\eP\e[4 q\e]12;#FF00DF\<C-g>\e\\"
     endfunction
    function! Echotermcursor ()
     call echoraw("\eP\e[2 q\e]12;#FF00DF\<C-g>\e\\")
     endfunction
    
    augroup termcursor
     au!
     autocmd ModeChanged *:n* let &t_ve ="\eP\e[2 q\e]12;#FF00DF\<C-g>\e\\"
     autocmd ModeChanged *:n* let &t_vi ="\eP\e[2 q\e]12;#FF00DF\<C-g>\e\\"
     autocmd ModeChanged i:* if &t_ve == "" | let &t_ve ="\eP\e[2 q\e]12;#FF00DF\<C-g>\e\\" | endif
     autocmd ModeChanged i:* if &t_vi == "" | let &t_vi ="\eP\e[2 q\e]12;#FF00DF\<C-g>\e\\" | endif
     autocmd ModeChanged *:i* let &t_ve =""
     autocmd ModeChanged *:i* let &t_vi =""
     autocmd ModeChanged *:t call echoraw("\eP\e[4 q\e]12;#FF00DF\<C-g>\e\\")
     autocmd ModeChanged *:t let &t_ve ="\eP\e[4 q\e]12;#FF00DF\<C-g>\e\\"
     autocmd ModeChanged *:t let &t_vi ="\eP\e[4 q\e]12;#FF00DF\<C-g>\e\\"
     autocmd ModeChanged t:* call echoraw("\eP\e[2 q\e]12;#FF00DF\<C-g>\e\\")
     autocmd ModeChanged t:* if (mode(1) != 'ct') | let &t_ve ="\eP\e[2 q\e]12;#FF00DF\<C-g>\e\\" | endif
     autocmd ModeChanged t:* if (mode(1) != 'ct') | let &t_vi ="\eP\e[2 q\e]12;#FF00DF\<C-g>\e\\" | endif
     
     " TODO -- doesnt restore from redraw?
     let g:cmdlinedepth = 0
     autocmd CmdlineEnter * let g:cmdlinedepth = g:cmdlinedepth + 1 | let &t_ve = "\eP\e[4 q\e]12;#FF00DF\<C-g>\e\\" | let &t_vi = "\eP\e[4 q\e]12;#FF00DF\<C-g>\e\\"
     autocmd CmdlineLeave * let g:cmdlinedepth = g:cmdlinedepth - 1 | if g:cmdlinedepth == 0 | if (mode(1) == 'ct') | call Termcursor () | else | call Normalcursor () | endif | endif
     autocmd CmdwinEnter * let &t_ve ="\eP\e[2 q\e]12;#FF00DF\<C-g>\e\\" | let &t_vi ="\eP\e[2 q\e]12;#FF00DF\<C-g>\e\\"
     autocmd CmdwinLeave * let &t_ve = "\eP\e[4 q\e]12;#FF00DF\<C-g>\e\\" | let &t_vi = "\eP\e[4 q\e]12;#FF00DF\<C-g>\e\\"
    
     " autocmd WinEnter * call echoraw("\eP\e[2 q\e]12;#FF00DF\<C-g>\e\\")
     augroup end