Patient: Every time I drink coffee I feel a pain in my right eye.

Doctor: Take the spoon out of the cup.

Simpsons did this one in the Planet of the Apes episode. Here's a musical rendition by Dankmus.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sMRcIOjdojU

What’s wrong with me?

I think you’re crazy.

I want a second opinion!

You’re also lazy!

I am not crazy! (in the voice of chuck from Better Call Saul)

I’m fond of an exchange from the end of “The Doctor Dances”:

Mrs. Harcourt : My leg’s grown back. When I come to the ‘ospital I had one leg.

Dr. Constantine: Well, there is a war on. Is it possible you miscounted?

You just need to practice.