It’s not that complicated. A lot of people don’t like condoms, either wearing them or having a partner wear them. PrEP, to many, has rendered condoms unnecessary.
A lot of people out there have managed to get past stigmatizing STIs, viewing bacterial ones as no more remarkable than sinusitis so long as they get tested and treated.
Between PrEP and vaccines for hepatitis and HPV, risks for the scariest STIs can be annulled, outside of exceptional, treatment-resistant cases.
Why not just not have sex unless trying to procreate? It's amazing in 2024 this line of discussion is happening.
We all know exactly at a individual level what to do and not. We can keep asking "Why not just use a condom?" and see how far that gets us, or actually understand psychology and use patterns and work with what people actually do (good or bad).
Same can be said about (illicit) drugs, why not just not do drugs? Simple!
It is a well known fact that people (except incels & asexuals) will have sex whether you like it or not. It's part of the human experience. Policy must deal with the real world.
You don’t, but people do. And even if they “shouldn’t,” the cost of contracting HIV—which very few people set out intending to do—adds up to an eyewatering sum over a lifetime, no matter who’s paying for it. Not to mention rendering someone, often young, dependent on heavy drugs to stay alive. Forever. Assuming the drugs remain effective.
What other risky lifestyle decisions do we advocate to punish that severely? Especially when the technology exists to ameliorate the risk?
Wouldn’t it be cool if simulated guns were as fun as real ones? Then your hypothetical person could get drunk and shoot guns all they want, and there’s no problem anymore! So what’s the virtue in leaving the real loaded gun lying around to test their willpower?
When all it takes is a daily pill, or an injection, to reduce the risks of drunk-driving a motorcycle to practically nil - wouldn’t you want to do it? You don’t even need to wear a helmet, you can just do whatever on your motorcycle and not worry about it.
You never have to think to yourself “hoo boy I’m at two beers, and I don’t know, should I have the third? Will that be too many? Am I going to need to get on my motorcycle in an hour? Or will it be more like three hours? What will my blood-alcohol level be at that point? Is this legal? Is this safe?”
You can just have fun getting fucked up and driving your motorcycle.
Modern medicine has given us this incredible thing, and you’re really going to be like “Naw I don’t know about all that.”
> Modern medicine has given us this incredible thing, and you’re really going to be like “Naw I don’t know about all that.”
I think that the only actual complaint I've ever heard against Prep is the costs being socialised and covered solely not by the user (ie insurance or public healthcare or whatever). It is (was?) not cheap!
i'm confused. are we acting like we don't full-well know that using a condom sucks for everyone involved? it's like wondering why people didn't like using a face mask during covid: because it sucks. that, of course, is independent from whether it's prudent, but if something sucks, it's no surprise when people avoid it, right?
> are we acting like we don't full-well know that using a condom sucks for everyone involved?
What do you mean "acting"? We all know it reduces the sensitivity. That's the trade off. You feel less pleasure, and your fucking doesn't get to kill you.
> it's like wondering why people didn't like using a face mask during covid: because it sucks.
Similar analogy. It sucked, but that was a similar trade off. It sucks a bit, but there's less chance it'll kill you or you'll kill others.
> it's no surprise when people avoid it, right?
I think those people would have to be fucking morons, but sure, morons exist.
People have a risk level they're comfortable with, and sometimes people feel added excitement pushing right up to or past that level, and sometimes they're just happy to pay extra for something they feel is within that risk level if they enjoy it more.
We all choose to take risks all the time and often pay for the privilege, sometimes explicitly seeking out the thrill of a risk.
I'm guessing what makes this specific scenario weird for you is more likely that this risk doesn't seem worthwhile to you relative to what you get from it (and I agree with that - I've never had an appetite for taking risks with STDs)
Being horny also counts as being “in an altered state of consciousness that biases against use of condoms.”
As someone who took the condom off in a risky situation recently, there’s no comparison between the on and off feeling. It’s like licking a piece of candy vs crushing it with your teeth and sucking it all at once.
Maybe you want the real thing. I get that, even though I have never had sex with a prostitute or fall into the risky sex category. I'm not going to go as far as to be childishly disrespectful and say I'd rather die doing the real thing, but I do understand the apprehension of using artificial barriers during the most intimate act know to humankind.
When somebody else takes a risk for you, you have to pay them more than if they are not taking a risk. We pay soldiers more when they are at war than when they are not. People who want to raise money by selling bonds have to pay a higher interest rate if their credit is worse. Etc.
Prostitutes would consider unprotected sex more risky, and thus charge more.
A better analogy would be to buy a '60s sports car that predates nearly all modern safety tech at auction for $$$$$$ instead of just buying a 2024 Corolla with modern safety features.
This is obtuse. The intent of expressing that if you are paying someone else for a service, it predisposes them to demand a higher price if you're asking them to take additional risks if they have any negotiating power at all was pretty obvious.
The comment above the one you replied to was. The comment you replied to was not, and it'd be reasonable to suggest it didn't really address what it replied to. But its intent was clear.
1. in sex work, "not using a condom" is an "extra" that clients will pay quite a bit for
2. people who "party and play" tend to be in an altered state of consciousness that biases against use of condoms