Honestly this doesn’t sound that different from my own competitive high school experiences almost 30 years ago. The fact that you and your peers bin Duke and Cornell into the second tier bargain bin suggests that your subset of peers may not be a representative sample of the student universe.
My HS was competitive but in the 90s you didn't have to build your global brand on social media or maintain a blog. The things we were measured by were largely private, like your grades, SAT scores, and application essays. Now you have to become a mini-celebrity and survive the onslaught of millions trying to knock you down. Every HS kid in the US is only a couple steps removed on social media.
Yes, and this is why it is hard for those (like me, HS student, 16yo) who avoid social media as a matter of privacy. I personally get left out of friend groups, etc. and when I was applying for an internship, one of the questions was "Please list your social media handles/accounts here"...
I'm pretty sure I know why I didn't get that internship :) They probably thought I was hiding something...
My friend is a high school principle in Washington state. He tells of fist fights between girls over a “diss” on Snap, girls (minors mind you) using social media to sell themselves (prostitution). I don’t know whether you’d call that more hedonistic or not but these are new twists on old problems.
Likely none of these kids at his school have much chance of getting into a T2 school.